A Lesson on Humility for a Rope Top

There have been a few incidences that I have happened across recently that have, to me, express a sense of overconfident youth.

There is, in many cases, tendency for the rope top to try to put of a sense of confidence that is there to affirm a sense of security for the bottom. However, there is several things that should be looked at to fulfil such a security and safety in the bottoms mind.

In the kink community, it is very much not uncommon to be tying someone who has a history that could rise up and change the circumstance drastically and suddenly. What happens when memories of a forced restraint bubbles up under even a simple wrist tie? Under a situation of manic frustration and depression, even a simple double column tie can be a struggle to remove.

Something that can greatly reduce things like anxiety and unknown psychological issues is simply reviewing with the bottom your safety protocols; make sure that not only you know where your EMT shears might be, but also make it clear that your partner is also comforted in knowing that you can reach them easily.

A more subtle detail, that most are oblivious to and I learned from my background in both Japanese martial arts and medicine, is to avoid annoying the nervous system. In the context of ground ties, if you need to navigate around your partner, try to avoid stepping around the head or face. If you stand up to walk around or step over the model, avoid walking over the upper torso and head. The body strives to protect this area of the body, and thus the nervous system reacts and responds to this intensively. An example of this is when you drop the rope to the ground, notice how your partner’s face and/or eyes flinch, sometimes drastically.

It is a sign of youth to strive to express one’s confidence without attempting to build it in others.


The new addition to the Dōjō family! #Kitsune #foxspirit

A photo posted by Atemi (@luke.crocker) on Jan 14, 2016 at 10:10am PST


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